The Little Things

... add up! They sure do.

God's been revealing Himself and His consistent faithfulness to me in small ways, and well, let me just say, it's all been adding up. Could it be that I am His delight? His desire and pursuit is to bless me? No way, but it's true. I'm so not worthy, often confused and distracted, but He keeps calling. Oh man. It makes me think of those lyrics from The Stand by Hillsong. What can I say? What can I do? But offer this heart, O God, completely to You. I want to be wholeheartedly abandoned to You, Lord Jesus. To the cross.

Okay, two things to share.

Money is one of my least-favorite things. It's so easy to get stressed because of it, and then to feel the need to be in control of it. I've been thinking a lot about how most people would probably say that they want to grow up (whatever that means), but we all want the benefits of it, and forget that it's not just roses and sweet pea spray. Coming into this school year from the summer, I still have no insurance. And I'm still quite a bit short for my current school bills.

1. For my internship this summer, I was expecting a scholarship around $2000. It's actually $2500.

2. I got the job as a Bethel Blogger today. That will be at least $100 credited to my student account each semester.

It's just one of those things, where trust is required through the process. God provides for His children. He always has. And He sets up ways for us to be creative and use the giftings He has given us through it.

He is faithful. With the little things. And they sure do add up.

Luke 16:10 reminds us that "Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much."

Since God is constantly gracing us with His faithfulness in the little things, that makes me super excited for the greater things to come. Ohh yeahhh.

Passion Play

Listen to this song: Passion Play by William Fitzsimmons. Purely wonderful.

I should not have hid
where my heart can't follow
cause this grace gets so far
and too hard to swallow
i've been running from Saul,
he's been giving chase
when i look in his eyes
all i see is my face

are you still on my back
after all these years?
chasing me out of hell
and my nice veneers
i don't know how you stand
when you've got no floor
or how you can breathe
with your hands on boards

i just want to be not what i am today
i just want to be better than my friends might say
i just want a small part in your passion play

do you hear when i call
in the midst of wrong?
do you hear these here words
while i sing this song?
are you caught up in me
like i heard you say?
or just some big cashier
that i'll have to pay

It..... Makes Me Want To SHOUT!

You know... Shout, the stuff that comes in spray bottles?

Anyway, today I spent the afternoon talking with and relaxing with God. At one point I was cloud gazing and no joke saw one that was a spray bottle! God was saying to me, "I'm spraying you with my Spirit!" I thought that was crazy -- Spirit Spray!! Haha.

Well, He certainly never gets old.

Also, I read a quote earlier from one of my old teachers:

"It's part of our duty as humans to spread joy." ~Ms. Kean

(The whole "makes me wanna shout" and then "shout for joy" made me think of it, hahaha!)

12 Hours

You are my peace, You give me hope. Yours is the voice that calms my restless soul.

12 hours. Can you believe it? I feel like I’ve been running around in circles, muddying myself for a few days in one puddle, and then moving on to another. 12 hours. Then I will be settled. Well, at least for another eight months. One of my professors from last year shared with my Old Testament class that “When God says ‘no’, it’s so that He can say ‘yes’ to something greater.” I have really been finding boat loads of truth in that, looking back at the challenges and accomplishments He has brought me through over the past year. I feel like it is the same with change. Moving from one thing to the other. School, summer, school again. I don’t know about you, but He is super good at keeping me on my toes, which in turn, keeps my eyes fixed on Him. Through the good, bad and ugly, a good friend of mine recently shared with me, “This is a good thing, no matter how difficult it is.” And to “Consider it boot camp for the realities that will come your way in the days to come.” And so, we are only ever moving forward, never looking back. Remember that. Walk in it.

You are my peace, You give me hope. Yours is the voice that calms my restless soul.

(Check out this link – the last five minutes or so of it is a song that the pastor of the church I was working at this summer wrote. It has a folky feel and the words are solid truth. Enjoy!) http://www.ministryconnects.com/Message/Player/?Media=735

Thoughts In This Empty Room

Here it is.

The time has come.

My last night in San Antonio has arrived, and I currently sit staring at my packed up luggage in this empty room. I sure hope my guitar is accepted as a carry-on. Coming here, and even being here, I didn't expect or even think I was going to miss it, or even the people as much as I know I am going to.

Today was such a blast! Nick took me out for lunch today, with a few others, to my favorite sandwich shop named Zito's. They are famous for their "serious" sandwich. And my last day at work was pleasant. Tonight Cindy made chili -- my favorite! And we went through two of my favorite psalms -- 13 and 42. We were able to engage in some really honest and relatable conversation. I am super encouraged from it. Then, we wrapped up the evening with one last Sonic trip, of course! Can't finish my time in Texas without a lime slush, haha!

Julia texted me earlier and said, "Enjoy your last day! Cherish it girl, trust me you will miss it!" I really did enjoy my last day here, and.... I think she's right.

Joe the tern, Jonathan and Lauren, Nick, Me and Billy outside Zito's!

Sarah and I harassing Jackie at the desk :)

The final goodbye with Ashley "Smash" Fizz :( I love that girl!